It was so silly how it stuck me right then. I saw him there, so small. When he barks…he becomes a giant, thunderous piercing right through, then rippling out like an earthquake from the epicenter of your body. Here I am so small in this big world. I laughed out loud, as a single tear ran down my cheek. I depend on him as much as he depends on me.
This question, is he here in my world to teach me to bring out my inner giant or am I here in his world, so he can learn a peaceful confident calm. You can go round and round, back and forth. It doesn’t matter, our paths are entwined. He has fallen behind. He is stuck somewhere, but I will wait for him. We all face our own inner challenges, some seem like impossible missions, all along the way.
We have walked through the darkest forests, the red glowing eyes watching, the white flashes of bared teeth and deafening growls. The coldest of nights lit by the pale blue moonlight, the deep, deep pristine snow, mile after desperate, unending mile. We walk alone. Threatening skies looming over the angry ocean, where dead eyed sharks seeming levitate as we fall down, down, down. The darkness engulfs us, until we can no longer see what comes for us. We shudder, we walk alone. For no one can take the steps, our journey’s steps for us.
Only you can face these inner fears that strike your daily life. They make your heart race, your breath stop. In the outside world, they are loss, conflict, stress, hurtful words. On the inside, they are paralyzing horrors, memories from the past or your greatest fears Coke to life. Visions that speed our foot fells as they ring through the night. We run, we fall, we crawl, we freeze in our tracks. Unable to curtail our own visions of terror, as we seek our own answers.
One day in the smallest of moments, you may see your first glimmering flash of hope. As you finally find yourself, standing in these moments, look around. Have you been here before? Did you survive, have you gained new skills since you were here last? Can you feel the moment, each breath? Can you make changes to what you see on your inner journey?
Look up, see the faintest sunlight staining the breaking clouds above. Look down, see the first fragile flower slipping through the melting snow. Look right, hear the echoes of the soft friendly voices just over the grassy hill. Look left, is there someone there, walking the path with you? Unwavering by your side in the most obscurest of moments. You never noticed these things before, but they are there quietly waiting for you to see.
Can we merge these internal and external journey’s, by seeking the smallest fleeting blessings in our day? Gather the tools to see things from a different perspective? Such as the last bit of color in the sunrise before you head into work, a friendly face that lights up to greet you, the sparkling snow as the moon rises on the night, maybe in the eyes of a stranger’s smile, that you cannot help but return.
Images that make your heart sing, if even just for one instant. Hold on to these moments, as you search for the next. String them together and maybe, gradually you can eradicate the darkness.
Now, see the skilled brushes you have accumulated, the colors you have gathered. You may not have all of the brushes you desire, you may seek still other colors. Look for them along your journey, but stop waiting for the perfect set of brushes, perfect image, the perfect time of day, the perfect feeling…
Stop waiting for your perfect to simply appear, pick up just one of these brushes. Select a color, any color will do, for they are your colors. Now with one bold brush stroke, just begin. Fill any empty space you find, with your colors. Look inside of you, not at the outside world. Find your creativity, imagination, confidence, joy, passion, your truth. Be brave, look inside your heart and paint yourself a new path.